TIME JUMP

Assalamu'alaikum... whoever happened to visit this page, I hope you are in the best condition of health and imaan. So I decided to republished my old posts. Previously, I was ashamed for some posts and my youth, but nothing is useless, what happened in the past was what made me who I am today, they were lessons, either succeses of failures. Fast forward over a decade later, I'm now a married woman and mother of twin-daughters, which I am really grateful about. Alhamdulillah. I work as a lecturer in a State Islamic University in Bukittinggi, something I never imagined before, but working in Bukittinggi was a consistent agenda in my prayer for 7 years. Those things I also being grateful about. Alhamdulillah. I still commit the same sins like a decade or two decades ago which saddened my soul. I want to have a tawba nasuha. May Allah Subhanahu wa Ta'ala ease... So yeah, I think that's enough for a quick update, hopefully I will have ideas about what my post next :) see you and assalamu'alaikum

Quick update

Assalamu'alaykum

I hope everyone's is doing fine.

I finally submitted my master thesis at December 8, yaiy! All praise is to Allah :)

after this what? I surrender to Allah, He decides all and I'll follow.
insyaa Allah I will have my defense on Dec 31, bismillahi tawakkaltu.

Lil bro fainted,got sick,having fever, fall from motorcycle, so we're like regular visitors of hospital these past months, Alhamdulillah it's nothing serious. My amateur guess is it was caused by psychosomatic, this boy is not used to campus life yet, and he's basically homesick all the time. I was like him back then, so I mostly understand. Now he's already home, leaving me alone in our rented house. O Allah,my Rabb, please protect me.

That's all for now.
Wassalamu'alaykum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh :)

Dear mommy..

Assalamu'alaikum ibu.

This is my first unsent letter to you.

You won't read this, you'll never do so,but my sentiment brought me here.

Happy belated birthday, I love you :)

Your birthday was 5 days ago,finally, I did it! I finally found pink carnations to buy. The flower that I've always thought I will give it for you someday, my bad, I only find them recently.

Soon, it will be two years after you left. There's so many things that already changed, in a good way.

We're getting closer to Allah, I'm now a changed woman, lil bro is getting mature. We're much calmer than before, even though shown his helpless belligerent rage sometimes :p

but bu, I'm still a lazy ass as always, you might cry if you're still alive, hehe.

I'm amazed that you don't throw me away at early age, because everybody knows that I made no use to you. I'm lazy,never get anything right, yet you still loved me, and for that I'm more than grateful.

You know bu, there are many times I'm still hoping for you to be alive, seems like I and lil bro couldn't get used to it yet. I miss you bu. I keep remembering when you tried to woke me up by tapping my nose, and when I opened my eyes,you said :

"you have no idea how much I love you, don't you?"

 My eyes will got teary everytime I think or talk about you.

 However we've been trying our best to be ikhlas, because we really love you. May Allah bless us continuously and may us reunited in His jannah. Aamiin.

Being born as your daughter is one of the best blessing I received from Allah SWT. Alhamdulillahirabbil'alamin.

Thank you for patiently took care of me.

May Allah bless you and forgives your mistakes.

with so much love and prayers,

your only daughter :)

 

 

 

Other lessons of life

Assalamu'alaikum everyone..

How's everyone doing? It's already the middle of February,how fast eh?

So, during this one and half month after my last blogpost,I've encountered many things and alhamdulillah I've learned quite good lesson of life.

In January,me,who was supposed to be enjoying my semester holiday and who planned to do thesis on early childhood education related had to face the ugly truth. My proposal was rejected twice, in other words, I had to re-write the thesis proposal right from the beginning in only one week,two times, went for proposal defense two times,assaulted two times. For the third times,I finally passed,but with a suggestion to change my main journal,which means,I have to start right from the beginning,once again.

I thought that was a big problem, I was thinking I'm the most miserable person in the whole world,because nothing went well as planned, I failed to filled up my family's expectation, because I thought,failed twice would make my father sad.

That's when Allah made me realize I was wrong. I am so lucky and my problem is just soooooo very trivial,unnecessary and I don't even have the right to complain,because there are so many blessings I forgot to be thankful for. I was really stupid, don't you think so?

After the third screening,I finally took sometimes to go home. I planned to stay only for 5 days tho. Once again,Allah showed me that me as a human only can plan something,it's Him who has the right to execute all. That time,my brother was hospitalized once again and I had to took care of him.

 

 

 Alhamdulillah, Allah made everything easier for us,Allahuakbar. Even I and dad was having attempt to selfie in hospital. He was doing his best to show off his teeth because I insisted so bad,but that's to funny that I end up laughing so hard and shaking,so the picture turned out so bad, then when I asked to do it once again, dad said he didn't want to x(

 Eventually,it's his 18th birthday, and we cannot celebrate it because he's still bedridden,and my dad's quite busy to give a surprise or something. However, his friend came to celebrate it,giving him surprise,birthday cake and a meaningful birthday present. 

That's so heartwarming,and I'm being thankful for his friends too. My brother recover after 3 days,alhamdulillah.

Anyway,that's not the end of the story.  At the same day my brother allowed to go home,I fainted, I vomited many times, my body temperature was so high, I couldn't eat anything,and  I barely have any consciousness, my dad rushed brought me to emergency unit of the same hospital that took care of my brother. What I thought that time was "I'm only a useless person, I only burden to my dad and brother,even being 22 years,I'm still useless", in my bare consciousness, I apologized to Dad for making tired and be a burden to him. Dad said it's okay,because I am his daughter,his responsibility, Allah put us in that situation,insyaAllah we can through it. I could only cried in silent.

That was the first time of me being hospitalized. I was diagnosed with having dyspepsia,fever and my lever didn't function quite well.  Alhamdulillah, I only have to get rest well as much as I can to recover. Alhamdulillah.

Health is really a blessing, we only know how precious it is when we become sick. However,sickness also a blessing,it reduced our sins. Went through all of this events made me being thankful more and more, I learn more how to be patient, and to not over-thinking. MasyaAllah.

Now I'm already back in Jakarta, have to attend class and be ready for my thesis. Bismillah.

Thank you for having some time to read this. May you are in the best health and iman.

The right things only come from Allah, the wrong belongs to me only.

See you in the next post insyaAllah.

Wassalamu'alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh :)

my 2013 in nutshell

Assalamu'alaikum everyone,it's 2014 now.

I have put down my wall calendar and change it with new table calendar.

2013 was a great year,indeed.

I leave my job and got my chance to do further study. I met  new people,having wonderful new friends,classmates.

Met the familiar faces on TV,in person quite often. Met 2 cousins of mine for the first time in my lifetime.

My cousins got married,my bestfriend got married.

I'm still in contact with friends I already know like since 15 years ago.

Still a good term with maung and other friends, and best of all, I have my family to support me.

This pic is actually is not enough to describe this year.

so to put it in review :

• Best moment of the year : Mbapika's wedding. 

• Movie of the year           : Despicable me 2. It's the first time I watched movie together with mbavina,kak indah,ci lily,listy and dessy. I think we got closer after watching this movie. I found it very funny,and still very funny. I've watched it like 3 times so far.

• Best book of the year     : Al-Qur'an. Forever it will be.

• Concert of the year        : One OK Rock. It's the only concert I watched in 2013 and it will be my last. No more concert for me.

• Destination of the year    : Jogjakarta. I've completely fallen. :D

• Toku babes of the year   : Koyomi. My love.

• Thing I love the most      : My room. I love it very much and I love it when my friends come and stay for a night or so. Mostly,we'll have girls talk and go "kyaaaa-kyaaaa", then fall asleep. I love my room too much that it's really hard to leave it.This is the reason why I came late to class :p

• What come and gone     : Sony Xperia S and iPod. I bought my cellphone on may,because my blackberry was crashed, then on December, I lost my iPod,still pretty sad tho.

• Most serious talk           : Considering my father to re-married. It was happened in august,my father and brother got sick very often,that's why I think they need a woman figure to take care of them and love them. At first week, I couldn't stop crying when the idea of my father loving another woman comes to my mind. Then, slowly, I think I will be fine with it. My father still have no interest on it tho. I'm still wishing for the best.

There are billion things to be thankful and be grateful for. InsyaAllah I've changed for the better and still will work harder to be better better better muslimah.

Sorry for my broken English. x)

Thank you for coming, wassalamu'alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh.

Their sweet condo,marriage life and other stories to tell :)

Assalamu'alaikum everyone..
I hope you're in the best condition of health and iman. Happy holiday.

It's semester break for me already. I have done my final exams, submitted my master thesis proposal, submitted all assignments, so the next task only to wait for my proposal screening schedule which somehow can be really unpredictable.
 Last week my brother was here,we got some quick escapades in Jakarta, then he left on Dec 25, and now I'm pretty much lonely and got nothing to do now.Ahem

Also last week, Bumen,Hanichu and I finally visited mbapika for the first time after she got married. Her condo is wayyyyy too far from my place,which means the distance is in our way to meet more often.
After being misguided by google maps, crossing the way which shouldn't be crossed,we're finally there. *feeling accomplished*

The condo is small yet very neat,clean and so mbapika. It reminds me a lot of our roommate era and when she stayed with Hanichu.
At glance,nothing really change. She's still mbapika we know, her laugh,her pouting face,her gestures,her habits,except for the baby bump in her belly,masyaAllah. Yes, insyaAllah we'll be aunties next year,alhamdulillah :)

What actually changed is that she's now having completely different life which is too complicated for my league. Ahheeee. I can't believe the roommate I once lived with,now talk and think about complicated things like their relationship as husband and wife, planning for future house,buying lands, her family financial planning, and how to raise baby of course,not to mention how she deals with her pregnancy. Which is really hard to catch,considering I'm still behaving like a kid,while my bestfriend literally will have a kid. OTL

Unfortunately, I forget to take a picture of her condo. I took a picture of Hani and Bumen instead.

They were imitating the bride and groom pose in their wedding photosoot,much to mbapika's chagrin x))))
also unfortunately,I don't have the original version and I couldn't take good picture because I was terribly shaking and awed seeing their pose,and it's turn out to be not that good, but they are cute,yes? :D


Alsooooooooo....talking about thesis now. I choose a topic based on my passion now. What's my passion? of course it's "early childhood education", then in what way it's related to financial management? well well, it's best to not reveal it until got the approval, I think.
And it's part of Bumen,Mbapika,Hanichu and my dream,actually. Hopefully the thesis will be useful for us in the future. aamiin...
Sooner,there'll be 'master thesis journal' tag in this blog, I suppose.

To end this post, let me be thankful about how Allah put me in Presuniv back then, to meet these wonderful people. I was really lucky. They are friends,partners, and older sisters to me at the same time. I miss them so much because we can't meet frequently unless we make serious planning like weeks before. Looking forward to meet them again.

For now,wassalamu'alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh :)

If birthday means something..

Assalamu'alaikum everyone.

This was actually for my birthday post,which is actually July 27 and yes,it's months ago.

This came when I checked my blogger dashboard, there's a draft which being ignored for a long time.

It's just the pic spam of my birthday dinner,actual and virtual gift from friends and relatives.

This year birthday was really special because of my classmates.

and I also learned that I should treasure those who really remember my birthday.

 

Beautiful ain't them? I  was really happy that day. Then I think about this, why must I celebrate it? The birthday is actually reminder that your days of life is running out,right? the reminder what have I accomplished and prepared for hereafter....

However, I'm still thankful that people around me shown me love that day,I feel really loved and blessed that day..

Ya Allah,all praises for your rahmah, I am really not worthy of them :(

Semester Break Story - Part 2 [Burn]

Assalamu'alaikum warahmatullahi wabarakatuh

Finally got to continue the series of post I've written in the past post

After watching Shin Domoto Kyoudai whose guest stars is Omi and Ryuji,I'm obsessed to Che'nelle song,titled burning love. Well,she's not even in the show tho, in the commercial of Burn instead, the song is very catchy that I kept playing and playing in my head. That's how the song become my everyday single playlist in whole holiday :D

Little did I know that Burn is actually is sold in Indonesia too,and I was super surprised when I did grocery shopping with lil bro and find the burn.

 

 I was so excited that I feel like meeting Che'nelle herself,lol, too much am I? I know I know,I'm exaggerating :P

and after being back to Jakarta,I've never played that song anymore..

feel like listening it now..

till then,Assalamu'alaykum :)

Semester Break Story - Part 1 [Panorama]

Assalamu'alaikum everyone :)
Holiday is over and I'm back on track, still in the holiday mood tho :p

Well,I'm planning to do series of post about my last semester break (which is not much),in random order :)

Let's get started ;)

It was almost the third week of my holiday when I got to meet Chaky and Widia after a year, wowww,that long. Somehow they feel really close because we communicate practically everyday through whatsapp, thx technology!


We did some common hang-out activity, walking, sight-seeing,eating,catching up all the stories, plus for the first time we visit panorama lobang jepang together, and first time Chaky visited it in her lifetime xD

random shoot

BFF for life

We met monkeys,snakes,monkeys,monkeys,baby monkeys,monkey king,wild monkey and monkeys. Nothing special,but somehow it's fun :)

Feeding monkey

cool man

Looking forward to meet my besties again sooner :)

Moving On..

Assalamu'ailaikum everybody..
This is probably too late,but I want to say this no matter what

                                 EID MUBARAK,EVERYONE :)

Sad thing is, I think I really didn't do much on Ramadhan, that's why I feel like don't deserve to celebrate eid al-fitr, coz I didn't win anything :(

Then,talking about holiday. Luckily, we got 1 month-holiday after short semester,yaiyyyy!!!

Alhamdulillah, I can come back home and celebrate eid with family for this year too :)

Me,lil bro,aunty,grandpa,and cousins

Lil Bro with baby niece

Let's move to another thing. It was always my dream job to be a pre-school teacher,and for these past 7 months I keep lamenting and blabbering about how I miss my old job,how fun it was,how nice the environment was,I hate studying and doing assignments,I wanna go back and quit,so on and so forth. 

So,I visit my former workplace the other day. I didn't meet any students,because the school time was finished that time. Everything has changed, the teachers already being replaced twice, the day-care babies already grown up,there are new babies also. My former students were pursuing their different ways. Some were made it to prestigious public elementary school, the other,who is not 6 years old yet,moved to private kindergarten which will help them to enter that said private elementary school without test. Some were moving to another town,or taken care of under their grandparents custody. The rest is continuing their education in my former school. 

Then, I feel like I should stop wanting to come back and focusing on my study instead..

Let all the moments of me being a pre-school teacher be a very good memories I want to keep remember. Eventhough I'm not sure the kids will still remember me now,but I'm happy enough :)

Play play and play~

Assalamu'alaikum :)

My final term exam is next week,yet the desire to play suddenly arise so significantly, haha..

I think I got wasted in this weekend.

I was watching Fast and Furious 6 on  Friday,accompanied the two barbarian friends,lol.

I was crying when watching Gisele and Han's progress of their relationship, the friends laughing at me so hard,told me many times "Ridh,it's not a romance movie,you know?"

I know it perfectly, oh,am I the only one who feel that their story is sad? ah maaaa (>w<)

Then taking some pictures on United Nations Peacekeeper Day at Epicentrum Walk.. (actually we forced asking the help of security for taking our picture :D )

 Aaaand,the day after,I finaly got to visit the event of Ennichisai- Little Tokyo at Blok M with Hanichu and Mbapika who were really kind to be my companies that day, thank you very much Al-Maung :)

Only found 2 tokusatsu Cosplayers,the Akiba Red whom I was taking picture with and Kuuga.

Little did I know that the SAT KOMUTAKU have their own show today,which means there are Fourze,Wizard,Kuuga,KR Girls and many more toku cosplayers showed up. waaaaaa,won't gonna miss it the next time.

That's for today, I've gotta study for sure!! (>w<)

See you next time,Insya Allah :)

A year after graduation (late post)

Assalamu'alaikum

It was April 25th,2012, I was sitting in the hall next to maung,surrounded by Class of 2008's members,all with graduation attributes.
Everyone seemed so happy,excited yet nervous. I was kinda sad.
That day,I was wondering what will I be in next year? working? getting married? or continuing school? will I still be in Jakarta? or back to Bukittinggi? or in a foreign country? What will maung be in next year? what will all these people in the hall be in next year?

One year comes so fast. I've been through many things,I've changed,my friends changed, I'm still here in Jakarta, maung too,some friends go to different cities,some stay in Cikarang,to pursue different dreams,different objectives.


I might be graduated from PresUniv, but I will never be graduated for all 3,5 years moments we have in that deserted area called Cikarang baru x)))